War
by Startix-Master of the NoLess
Summary: Not all wars are fought with infantry and tanks. Others are fought with cellphones, psychotic animated cats and a slew of exasperated sighs. Rated T for language.


**Disclaimer**

TWEWY, nor none of its awesomeness belongs to me. Now on with the show.

* * *

><p>"I was the one who got him to open up most."<p>

"You should be careful how you use those words, Shiki, because I've gotten him to 'open up' in ways you couldn't possibly imagine."

Neku let out a long, drawn out sigh and buried his hands in his face. The gods (or Angels or Reapers or whoever was responsible for his karma) must've hated him.

* * *

><p>'Twas Friday night in Shibuya, roughly 6pm and the nightlife was ready to take off. Neku, while changed forever due to the Game, was still, by and large, an introvert, content to spend his Fridays at home, listening to music, snacking or just popping open a good book.<p>

Imagine his surprise when he hears a knock on the door and opens it to find Shiki, arms laden with board games, DVDs and snacks (and, of course, her prized Mr. Mew), having come to alleviate his boredom, a smile on her face that could light up Dogenzaka.

Neku wasn't exactly big on kiddie things like board games (that, and the sight of Mr. Mew still unnerved him to this day), but Shiki was his first real friend and her company was always appreciated.

Then Joshua showed up.

Appearing as if from nowhere (it was practically his trademark), he had come wearing his signature dress shirt and slacks, telling Neku to get dressed up in his Friday best, that they were going out for a night on the town.

That was when Shiki made her presence known.

Still a teeny bit afraid of Joshua and the fact that with a flick of his phone he could rain vending machines on her head, she had very politely said that she and Neku were going to spend the night having fun, just the two of them.

"Now, how could that be," said the silverette. "When Nekky dear has already made plans with yours truly?"

Neku, oddly, had recalled making no such plans.

However, the Composer's smugness would not deter her from hanging out with the orangette. "Is this true, Neku?" she asked, turning on her patented 'Shiki Appeal' (which was really just her widening those adorable brown eyes of hers and giving a pleading look that you'd have to be made of stone to say no to).

Neku sighed and put his arm around Shiki's shoulder. "Sorry, Josh, but she got to me first."

Joshua frowned as the brunette stuck out her tongue, certain she had achieved victory. "Oh, Neku, after all the trouble I went through to get you these."

Orangette and meganekko froze as the Composer pulled from his pockets two small slips of paper, handing them to the teen boy. Neku took them and stared at them with wide eyes, as did Shiki when she got a good look at them. His hands shook and Shiki felt her jaw drop. "Are these..." he stammered, unable to believe what he was holding." Are these..."

"Tickets to Def Märch's sold-out one night only concert?" Joshua smirked. "Maybe."

Shiki sputtered in indignation as Neku gave the silverette an amazed look. "How did you get these? That concert's been sold out for six months! These must've cost a FORTUNE!" Joshua shrugged. "Not much. Just something along the lines of ¥768,644."

Shiki swore she heard the sound of glass breaking. It was probably her heart. She squeezed Mr. Mew so hard, she thought she might activate her psych by accident. '_Damn that Joshua._' thought the shy girl. '_I was supposed to have Neku all to myself tonight. Why'd you have to come along and ruin it?_'

Acting on impulse, Shiki grabbed Neku's arm, surprising both boys. "Sorry, Josh, but Neku's hanging we me tonight. Maybe you should take Rhyme, she likes Def Märch."

Joshua scowled and grabbed Neku's other arm. The orangette suddenly felt trapped between a rock and a very supernatural place. "I believe I'm hanging out with Neku tonight. These tickets are non-refundable. And Beat doesn't like Rhyme listening to that kind of music." And yet Beat listened almost exclusively to SAWA nowadays.

Shiki gently tugged, pulling Neku closer to her. "He's staying with me."

Joshua tugged back. "He's going with me."

Neku sighed inwardly and flopped down on the bed. This was gonna be a LONG night.

* * *

><p>Shiki and Joshua stared at each other intensely, neither one blinking or even moving. Neku had to give them credit; they were both stubborn as HELL. He glanced at the clock and saw that it was almost 7:30. Whatever they were gonna decide, they had better decide it soon.<p>

"I was his first real friend."

"I'm his lover."

"I was his first kiss."

"I'm his everyday kiss."

Neku really wished the two of them wouldn't use their collective romantic history as weapons against each other. Yes, Shiki was indeed his first kiss, but after Neku discovered he 'utilized a different psych', so to speak, she, while heartbroken, had been nothing but supportive (despite her intense fear of the Composer), becoming a true friend while the on-again-off-again emo discovered himself.

And Joshua...well, does the term 'consensual rape' mean anything? It was like his hands were magnetic and Neku was made of metal. Or, more specifically, his ass. To say that his other friends were shocked when it turned out Joshua was hot for Neku, well, that was an understatement.

His response was even more so. "Silly boys and girls. Love shouldn't be hindered by something as trivial as a gender barrier."

And thus was born the Shiki/Neku/Joshua triangle.

It was Ross/Rachel in its complexity, Jerry/Elaine in its (slight) camaraderie and Dante/Trish in its tension.

It was shaky, but there was a delicate balance of powers that was rivaled in structure only by the Triforce. Shaky, but workable.

"I was his entry fee in his last Game."

"You know you weren't. That was just a ruse by Megumi."

"Dammit!"

Neku glanced at the clock again. 7:45. Soon, it was going to be too late to do anything except stay in.

"I have an idea." spoke Joshua, catching the attention of both boy and girl. "Why don't we play a Game?"

THAT was where Neku drew the line. "Oh, hell no." he said, standing up, a dark look on his face. "No way are you going all Samara in my house; I JUST vacuumed." The silverette giggled that insufferable (yet alluring) giggle of his and shook his head. "Oh, relax, Nekky dear. It's nothing too bad. Just a little coin toss. I wanted to choose something for Shiki's skill level."

"Hey!" she said, pouting. "What's that supposed to mean? A coin toss is all luck!" "Exactly." "GRAH!"

Neku felt a nagging in the back of his head that told him this was gonna get a LOT worse before it got better. Joshua sighed and slinked over to Shiki and put an arm on her shoulder. "Look, Shiki. I'm a reasonable man. I believe in achieving victory through nonviolent means. ('_Pfft._' snorted Neku in his mind. '_Yeah, right._') Now, we can settle this like two well-meaning, fun-loving teenagers..."

Faster than any eye could follow, he whipped out his orange cell phone, which began crackling with his Imagination.

"Or we can get into some old gangster shit."

Neku sighed and hung his hands in his head once more, asking why he couldn't just have a normal Friday.

Quick as a wink, Shiki pulled out a small pin from her dress pocket; a picture of a chess piece with music notes surrounding it and slapped it onto the back of her stuffed animal's head; her psych Groove Pawn. "Get him, Mr. Mew!"

Neku rubbed his temples and slowly walked out of his house as the sounds of bicycles and street signs came crashing down, punctuated by the sounds of a feral cat slashing and scratching, given guidance by his mistress.

As Neku heard the sounds of destruction in his house, he shoved his hands in his pockets and made his way to Cat Street. "I wonder what Mr. H is up to..."

* * *

><p>"So," said the self-proclaimed 'hip barista', setting down a macchiato in front of the downcast teen. "Trouble in paradise?"<p>

Neku sighed and took a sip of the rich coffee, eyes lidded in despair. "Sure, you could say that. If by 'trouble' you mean 'complete and totally unnecessary disaster', yeah. Something along those lines."

Neku sighed and took another sip. "Why can't Josh and Shiki settle their differences like normal, non-superpowered people?"

Hanekoma chuckled and walked behind the counter, where he began rinsing out an emerald-green coffee mug. "Hey, your life's your life, Phones. Gotta take a little bad with the good."

Neku chuckled and took another sip. Just like Hanekoma to provide him with sage advice in the form of some clever quip.

"Um...Neku?"

The orangette turned around to see Shiki and Joshua standing at the entrance to WildKat. The pair, done with their little spat, looked incredibly worse for wear. Shiki's dress was torn and one of the lenses of her glasses was gone, the other cracked. She held Mr. Mew tightly in her arms, rips on some parts of his body and stuffing coming out.

Joshua looked just as bad. There were dozens of bites, scratches and claw marks all over his face and body and his shirt looked as though it had gotten into (and lost) a fight with a cheese grater. His phone's screen was shattered and a few keys were missing.

Neku stared in absolute horror. If that was what they looked like, IMAGINE what happened to his house. Hanekoma blinked and stepped into his office; this was strictly a matter between friends.

Joshua and Shiki limped over to Neku's booth and sat down, both wincing painfully. Shiki set Mr. Mew down on the table, pulled out her sewing kit and began fixing him, while Joshua spoke. "We've come to a bit of an agreement."

Neku scoffed and blew a stray strand of hair out of his face. "Oh, really? You two are gonna rent out the Concert Hall next time you wanna kill each other?"

Joshua blinked. "No, but we'll keep that in mind. It's about our...situation."

Shiki, having finished repairing her precious cat, hugged the toy close to her and looked down ashamedly. "We realize that we're kinda...owning you. Treating you more like a possession than a friend." Neku said nothing, but the urge to snap back with a sarcastic 'DUH' was intense. Shiki continued. "So, for now, Josh and I have decided to call a truce."

"A very STRICT truce." quickly cut in the Composer, casting the bespectacled girl a glare she couldn't help but cower under. Sighing, he pulled out the concert tickets. A third one poked out behind the original two, stunning the orangette. "H...how did you...?"

Joshua waved his hand dismissively. "I just went back in time a little to when they were on sale and picked up a third one. No big deal." It was times like these that made Neku remember just how powerful the silverette was.

Neku slumped in his seat, coffee long forgotten. "It doesn't matter. The concert's probably over by now."

Joshua giggled. "Ah, Neku. Ever the forgetful one. I'm the Composer, remember? Did you even LOOK at the time?"

Blinking, Neku whipped out his phone, eyes darting to the clock. 6pm. "No way..."

Joshua smiled and picked up both Shiki and Neku. "Come along, you two. It's a long walk to A-East."

* * *

><p>If you can believe it, I wrote this entire thing around a single line. Can you find it? If you can...well, you don't win anything, but it'd be nice to guess. Read, review, whatever.<p> 


End file.
